Divorced Parents

The holiday season can be a challenging time for divorced parents, but it’s crucial to prioritize the well-being of your children and create a positive and memorable experience for them. Balancing the needs and desires of both parents while ensuring the well-being of the children can be tricky. Below are some practical tips and strategies to help divorced parents effectively navigate the holidays.

1. Focus on the Best Interest of the Children: During the holiday season, make your children’s needs and happiness your top priority. Set aside any personal conflicts you may have with your ex-spouse and focus on creating a joyful and loving atmosphere for your children. Be flexible and willing to compromise to ensure they can enjoy meaningful time with both parents if that is want. Encourage open dialogue with your children, allowing them to express their wishes.
2. Talk to your Children: Consider your children’s wishes about what they want to do in connection with the upcoming holidays. Consider their wishes and involve them in the planning process if they are old enough to contribute. 
3. Create New Traditions: Embrace the opportunity to create new holiday traditions with your children. This can create a sense of excitement and anticipation, even after divorce. Suggest ideas such as volunteering together, participating in community events, or starting new holiday activities that can be enjoyed year after year. New traditions can help make the holiday season special and unique, even after divorce. 
4. Be mindful of Emotions:  The holiday season can bring up a range of emotions for both the parents and the children. Be understanding and compassionate towards each other and your children. Seek support from friends and family if needed. Demonstrate positive behavior and avoid negative comments or conflicts in front of the children. Respect each other’s time and traditions.  Remember, a clam and positive demeanor can greatly influence your children’s experience during this time. 
5. Respect Boundaries:  Respect your co-parent’s boundaries and avoid negative or confrontational behavior. Maintain a respectful and peaceful atmosphere for the sake of your children, even if you may not get along with your ex-spouse personally. Encourage your children to have a positive relationship with their other parent, free from animosity. Make sure your children understand that having a great holiday with the other parent is ok and is not a betrayal to the relationship they have with you. 
6. A Gift for the Other Parent: Encourage  your child  to shop for a gift for the other parent. If circumstances allow, offer to assist your child in purchasing a thoughtful present for their other parent. This gesture demonstrates goodwill toward your ex-spouse and it also taches your children to think of others. It can help them maintain a healthy relationship with other parent and as well as help mitigate any feelings of guilt or confusion, they may experience during the holiday season. 
7. Prioritize self-care when your children are spending the holidays with your ex-spouse:  Use this opportunity to focus on yourself and recharge. Engage in activities that bring you joy and relaxation. Whether its spending time with friends and family, pursuing hobbies, or practicing self-reflection, taking care of your own well-being is crucial. By nurturing yourself during these periods, you’ll be better equipped to be the best parent you can be when your children return. Self- care is not selfish, it’s an investment in your own mental an emotional health which ultimately benefits both you and your children. 

Planning for the holidays as divorced parents can be challenging but with effective communication a focus on the best interest of the children, and cooperative mindset, it is possible you create meaningful holiday experiences for everyone involved. By working together and prioritizing the well-being of your children, you and your ex-spouse can navigate the holiday season in a way that promotes harmony and joy.