Megan B. Rachel, Attorney At Law

Family Law, Divorce, and Child Custody Law Firm

214-396-2048

Family Law

How to Make Your Divorce Child Centered

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A child-centered divorce keeps the children at the center of the action without putting them in the middle of the divorce.

During a child-centered divorce, the parents keep the focus on resolving the divorce without emotionally damaging the children.  Consequently, engaging in a child-centered divorce action can limit the negative impact a divorce can have on children.  Children generally will adjust to the fact that their parents are divorcing, but they will adjust much better in the long run if parents can work through the divorce putting their children’s needs first and foremost.

While the emotional turmoil and explosive arguments between divorcing parents may not have an overall impact on the divorce itself, it can have a devastatingly negative impact on the children.

During the divorce, parents should agree to not argue in front of the children.  In addition, remember that just because the children may not be in the same room as you and your spouse, does not mean that cannot hear the arguing between you and your spouse.  So, don’t argue in front of the children, but also do not argue within the hearing of the children.

Remember this, children are children and should never have to worry about adult things.

Don’t talk to them about the divorce.  Don’t say negative things about the other parent either to or in the presence of or hearing of the children.  Don’t ask their advice or input regarding anything relating to the divorce and do not use them to deliver messages or anything else to the other parent.

It is important for children to understand that even though you and their other parent are divorcing, the child will continue to be loved and cherished by you both.  You and the other parent should work together as team both during the divorce and afterwards to ensure that your children continue to feel as loved, secure, happy and as untroubled as possible.

Let them know often that it is important to you that they have a positive relationship with the other parent Let them know that both you and the other parent are committed to ensure that their life during and after divorce will change as little as possible.

In light of the above, it is important to note that litigating your divorce in court usually ends up pitting you and your spouse against each other.

Litigation is an adversarial process and inevitably you and your spouse will treat each other as adversaries.  This can make reaching your goal of a child centered divorce difficult at best.  Whether you are just contemplating divorce or have made the decision that divorce is inevitable, look into the Collaborative Divorce process whereby you and your spouse work together with your attorneys and team neutrals to come to a final resolution which is best for everyone but first and foremost the children.

How you hand your divorce now can have a profound effect on how your child relates to you and the other parent in the future.

Contact me online or call 214-396-2048 to schedule a consultation to discuss your family law needs today.

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5 Tips For Texting Your Spouse During Divorce

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One of the strengths about texting while divorcing is that it does not require a conversation that could get out of hand. One of the weaknesses is that texting can feel anonymous and that is the farthest thing from the truth.

If you or your spouse has made the decision to file for divorce keep in mind that anything you text (or email) to your spouse can very possibly be entered into evidence at a temporary order hearing or a final trial.  Depending on what is said in the text messages it could affect the Judge’s decision regarding issues such as custody of or possession of and access to the children, division of assets spousal support, etc.

Following are a few tips to help you in making sure that you do not put something in a text or email that can be used against you later in court.

Hopefully, these tips will keep you from saying something out of anger or frustration to your soon to be ex-spouse that could come back to haunt you later.

  1. Take the time to think about what you are texting.  Do not send a text when you are angry, hurt or frustrated.  Nothing good can come from attacking your spouse via text no matter how angry or hurt you may be.
  2. Before you hit the send button ask yourself if this is something you would want the Judge to see during a hearing or trial. If not, don’t send.
  3. If your spouse is texting you rude, hateful or nasty comments don’t respond in kind.  Do save the texts in case your attorney may want to use them.
  4. Just because your soon to be ex sends you a text, does not mean you have to respond.  Do not engage with your spouse in a back-and-forth text exchange especially when he/she is texting an attempt to bait you into an argument.
  5. Don’t think you can send offensive texts and then save yourself by deleting the text.  Just because you deleted it does not mean our soon to be ex did.

In addition to the above know also that is not just texts or emails you send your soon to be ex that can be used against you.  It is any text or any email you may send to anybody that relates to your spouse, your children or what may be happening in relation to your divorce.

You can effectively use texting during a divorce for simply coordinating schedules.  Short texts with no emotion to confirm times or schedules can make for smoother communication and helps the divorce process to move forward.

Contact me online or call 214-396-2048 to schedule a consultation to discuss your family law needs today.

Texas protective orders against domestic abusers

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Texas law sets out procedures for the victims of family violence to obtain protective court orders against their assailants.

Texas laws allow family-violence victims to seek court orders protecting them from their abusers, and the numbers support the need for protective orders to keep people safer.

Texas family violence

According to the Texas Department of Public Safety or DPS, in 2012 there were almost 200,000 instances of family violence in the Lone Star State, an 11.5 percent increase over 2011. When gender was known, about three-quarters of the victims were women or girls, and about one-quarter male.  The gender numbers for perpetrators were flipped: about three-quarters were male.

The highest number of victims – as well as offenders – was 20 to 24 years old.  Almost all of the incidents fell into the category of assaults, mostly simple assault.  “Major injuries” were reported in almost 10 percent of the incidents responded to by law enforcement, with the highest numbers being internal injuries or lacerations.

More than 80 percent involved perpetrators using their hands and feet as weapons to inflict injury, as opposed to using guns or objects as weapons.  Incidents with no weapons accounted for 7.5 percent, which involved threats (still considered family violence if they create fear of imminent harm).

Texas Protective Orders Attorney

The Texas Family Code contains many complicated procedures for protective orders against family violence and dating violence.  Because of this complexity, a family lawyer can be especially helpful to an applicant seeking one.

Alternatively, an attorney with protective-order experience can vigorously defend a person against whom such an order is wrongly or unnecessarily sought, including a possible rescission or appeal if an order is issued.

A protective-order application can be filed independently in state court or in conjunction with a divorce or a suit affecting the parent-child relationship.

The law says simply that the Texas state court shall render a protective order if the judge finds a history of family violence and the likelihood that it will continue.

“Family violence” is defined as an act by the “member of a family or household” (even if not related) against another member meant to cause injury or sexual assault, or a threat of such an act that makes the intended victim fear for “imminent physical harm, bodily injury, assault, or sexual assault…”

Family violence also includes abuse of a child in a family or household by a member of that family or household, as well as dating violence.

Dating violence means the same acts or threats as described in family violence, but against another person with whom the perpetrator has or has in the past had a dating relationship, defined as a “continuing relationship of a romantic or intimate nature.”  Dating violence also extends to victims who are married to or dating a third party with whom the abuser also has or has had a marriage or dating relationship.

A victim can seek a short-term temporary protective order “ex parte” (without notice to the alleged perpetrator) for up to 20 days with the possibility of another 20-day extension.  A regular protective order requires notice to and service on the alleged perpetrator and the court has specific time limits within which to schedule a hearing.

A regular protective order can last up to two years or longer in the worst cases.  A judge can order many things such as prohibiting the respondent from taking a child or pet, or from disposing of mutually owned property; giving the victim use of the residence or other property even if jointly owned with the respondent; providing custody, visitation and child support arrangements; ordering a battering prevention program; forbidding communication or contact; and more.

Overdue Child Support Payments – Getting Behind in Texas

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Texas collects more child support than any other state, but when it comes to collecting overdue payments, Texas is behind. This causes many problems for parents who are struggling to make ends meet and pay for their children’s educational expenses and even keep their children fed. The state has a responsibility to these children and must make sure that they are doing everything in their power to collect their past due child support.

Highlights of the National Survey

According to a national survey, child support payments come in at an average of $430 per month or about $5,150 per year to children under the age of 21. Other interesting data from the survey showed that only 15 percent of child support payers are women and 85 percent of them are men. The majority of child support providers are providing for one child and about three in ten are providing for two children while the rest are providing for three or more children.

Past Due Payments in Texas

Currently, there is about $13.3 billion owed in overdue child support in Texas. When a parent that is supposed to be paying child support does not pay it, there are options. One option that custodial parents have in making sure that child support payments are paid is to file a lawsuit and request that the child support agreement with the noncustodial parent is enforced by the court.

The state also has options on what it can do to help custodial parents get the child support that is owed for the care of their children. For example, the state can require employers to deduct what is owed from the employee’s paycheck and withhold wages until the child support is paid.

Licenses may also be suspended including professional licenses, driver’s licenses and hunting licenses. Liens may be filed against the noncustodial parent’s property and assets.

Other monies going to the noncustodial parent can also be intercepted. Tax refund checks and lottery winnings can be withheld and paid over for child support. This is true for other monies that the noncustodial parent receives from the state or federal government. This is true for parents living in Texas and parents that live in two different states.

Parents who are owed child support must have protection. An experienced family law attorney is a great resource for struggling parents. As listed above, there are many ways to get the payments from the owing parent, but an attorney can help people navigate through the often confusing system and make sure that their children are getting the things that they need.

Michael Moore and wife finalize divorce and division of assets

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On behalf of Megan B. Rachel, Attorney At Law posted in Family Law on Wednesday, July 30, 2014.

When wealthy Texas couples divorce, they face many of the same issues as any other divorcing couple. The division of assets in a high net worth divorce can be much more complicated, however. When a couple owns multiple homes and has extensive investments, valuing and dividing it all up can take a lot of work and lead to some bitter disputes.

Recently, filmmaker Michael Moore and his wife finalized their divorce in Michigan state court. The couple was married for 22 years. Despite his public image as a champion of the common person, court documents and news reports reveal that Moore and his wife are anything but, at least financially speaking. The couple reportedly has a net worth of about $50 million, mostly earned from the proceeds of Moore’s documentaries which include “Roger & Me” and “Bowling for Columbine.” Moore’s wife co-produced some of his earlier films.

The couple owned nine properties, including a $2 million mansion in Michigan and a condo in New York City that used to be three apartments. The Michigan property was apparently a bone of contention between the two; Moore suggested in court filings that his wife had spent too lavishly on the home. In the end, the pair was able to reach an amicable settlement.

When Texas couples divorce, the division of assets is subject to the state’s community property laws. Assets acquired by either spouse during the marriage are considered community property and must be divided in a manner that is fair under the circumstances. With real estate, this usually means the property must be appraised to determine its present value. It can then either be sold and the proceeds split, or one party can keep the property with the other getting a corresponding increase in their share of the property division.

Getting one’s fair share in divorce is not always a simple matter. A spouse in a high-income marriage who is contemplating divorce can benefit from consulting a family law attorney with experience in sophisticated asset valuation issues.

Source: Daily Mail, “Michael Moore’s lavish property empire is revealed in court documents as he and wife of 22 years divorce,” July 24, 2014